After
by Evansis
Summary: We've all heard the prophecy, and we all know that in the end it will be Harry or Voldemort. But what about the rest of the wizarding world? What happens after the war with Voldemort? Will everyond just go back to their happy lives?
1. After 01

Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter, JK Rowling does. Wish I did, but I don't.

-Chapter One-

"A Time to Heal"

There is a saying, _'It's better to have loved and lost, than to never have loved at all'_. This phrase is a cliché and severely overdone, but its meaning rings true for all situations where one suffers a deep loss. No one enjoys losing someone, but sometimes loss is a harsh fact of reality.

In the weeks after 'the end', the Wizarding world was numb. Many, torn between elation for the downfall of Voldemort and depression for the family and friends lost, sunk into their own reality. There they could find their own form of twisted solace. Others, facing the truth head-on tried to fill the gaps in the working order of the Wizarding community. Shops were temporarily closed, parties were thrown, memorial services planned. In this constant chaos, few had time to stop and consider the future. Who could, when living in the present was its own kind of miracle.

St. Mungo's was full. All of the available rooms had been filled, and the patients didn't stop coming. Seeing as there is no way to tell people to just stop hurting themselves, the hallways of St. Mungo were now full as well. The whole place was in disorder, and with no way to keep proper track of patients, regretfully, there were some that fell in the cracks.

The healers at St. Mungo's had trained themselves to stop thinking about their patients. If you stopped to think, you would be utterly overwhelmed due to the enormity of the situation. If you stopped to think, the actuality of everything would suddenly become clear. The Wizarding world had won out, but at a high price.

Because of the abrupt inattentiveness of the healers, and most of the patients, no one noticed Hermione sitting ruefully outside the Hexes wing on the fourth floor. Pondering as she absently pulled on her full brown hair. Although still unbelievably bushy, her hair was somewhat more under control than it had been in her Hogwarts days.

She studied her hands, fondling the ring on her left hand, contemplating what it meant. She quietly memorized her hands, as if in fear that they might disappear any moment. She had been this way for some while, silently taking in her surroundings, absorbing every detail, privately hoping it all wasn't some horrible dream. The past few days had passed in a blur for Hermione. She honestly couldn't recall what she had done to pass the time, but it flew, one fatal moment after another.

Hermione had never felt so helpless in her entire life. Not since she had to leave Harry alone, in the forbidden corridor so she could help Ron their first year. _'We did some crazy things when we were younger.'_ Hermione half smiled, the memories of Hogwarts were some of her favorites. This was not the first time she had sat and pondered the life she had at Hogwarts. _'But, that was before the war.'_

Sighing inwardly, Hermione wrapped her blanket tightly around her. She was not cold, but the gloom of the corridor made her shiver. Closing her eyes against the tears that threatened to fall for the umpteenth time, Hermione could feel her body start to succumb to the arms of sleep. She tried to will herself not to sleep, for in sleep the nightmares came. In sleep, she was faced with hollow images of war and pain.

'_Don't think about that!' _She berated herself. _'You don't want to remember.'_

Feeling immensely sorry for herself, Hermione was continuing to stave off sleep, when a voice forced her awake.

"Hermione?"

Drowsily lifting only one eyelid, Hermione stared at her rescuer. Recollection took its time, but after a few moments, Hermione recognized the soft red hair of Ginny Weasley. "Ginny!"

"I thought I'd find you here," The surprising morose Weasley responded. "I was here with Mum and Dad, visiting Fred and Ron, so I thought I'd come and find you."

"How are they doing?" Hermione wearily asked.

"Better, the healers are hoping that they'll be able to return home in a few weeks. At least what's left of it."

Hermione winced at the reminder of the Weasley's terrible loss. Images of the rubble that had once been the burrow passed through her mind. Hoping to find a way to change the subject, Hermione inquired, "How's your mom holding up?"

Ginny sensed Hermione's attempt at a change of topic, and decided to play along. "She's doing well. But, you know mum, not having anything to do is nearly killing her."

Hermione smiled sadly, she knew exactly how Mrs. Weasley felt.

"How are _you_ holding up, Ginny?" Hermione eased.

Ginny's composure immediately stiffened, and Hermione couldn't ignore the slight sob that escaped Ginny's lips. Losing all resolve not to cry, Ginny let the tears flow.

"I'm . . . sure I-I'm . . . not d-doing . . . as w-well as I l-let on!" Ginny sobbed.

Hermione, surprised at Ginny's apparent distress, took her friend's hand and pulled her into the seat next to her. By now, Ginny was blubbering like a baby. Suddenly Hermione wasn't tired anymore.

"It's alright Gin! I understand." Hermione helplessly attempted to sooth Ginny, while her own emotions threatened to surrender.

"They still haven't found him, you know. Even now, after all this time, they can't find George. They can't even find a body." Ginny stated after a good cry. "I wish beyond all hope that he is still alive, but if he isn't, I just want to be able to put him to rest."

Hermione nodded sympathetically, having faced her own demons of grief, she understood how the youngest Weasley felt about now. "I know Ginny, I felt the same way after the war, when I didn't know where Harry was. I honestly thought he was dead, and if he was, I wanted to find a body to bury." Hermione paused as emotion threatened to take over. "I guess I was one of the luckier ones."

"How is Harry?" Ginny asked as if she suddenly realized he exists.

"Better..." Hermione found herself saying. "The healers have managed to heal everything they could, but they still haven't been able to wake him. We all hope that he'll wake soon, but we're not sure that he will."

"For all our sakes, I hope he does." Ginny expressed.

The conversation halted, and they both sat in companionable silence until Arthur Weasley came for Ginny. "I'm sorry Hermione, but Molly wants to speak with Ginny..." Mr. Weasley trailed off, suddenly deep in thought.

"It's alright, I should go and check on Harry, then head home. I'm sure Crookshanks has gone batty by now." Hermione tried to hide her disappointment by suddenly finding a reason to become busy.

"Thanks 'Mione!" Ginny sighed, patting her friend on the shoulder. "Be sure to come and visit Ron before you leave."

"I will, Ginny. You be sure to tell him I'll come."

Pondering, Hermione watched them leave. "Ginny?" she called. "I'm sure they'll find George, and soon."

Ginny smiled in reply and continued toward her mother's room.

_So much has changed since the war..._

Hermione entered the familiar room to find Remus Lupin sitting by Harry's bed. Remus looked like he had been through the wringer. His hair was flying in multiple directions, and he had dark circles under his eyes, due to lack of sleep. Hermione assumed that she must look somewhat close to the same state.

Remus glanced up as she entered, his eyes searched expectantly for answers he knew he may not receive.

"No word from the healers." Hermione answered his silent questions.

"Nothing's changed anyway." Remus drew in a deep breath, and released it slowly. Hermione recognized this as one of his mechanisms for stopping tears. Hermione herself has need of a few such mechanisms herself.

"Why don't you get some rest? I will floo you if anything happens." Hermione offered. She was silently hoping to have some alone time with Harry.

She let out an almost audible sigh when Remus accepted. "I suppose I am in need of some rest, I'm no good to anyone while I'm half-asleep." He rose from his chair and stretched his arms. "Besides, I'm sure you are in need of some time with him." Remus almost smiled as he passed her out the door.

"Be sure to say good-bye to the Weasley's on your way out." Hermione coaxed.

"I will."

Then he was gone, leaving Hermione alone with Harry. Suddenly Hermione felt slightly weird. What do you say to a man who's unconscious? The idea was absolutely ludicrous, but she knew that if she didn't unload, she was likely to explode.

"Hi Harry," she began. "It's me, 'Mione. I don't know if you can hear me or not, but I'm just going to talk anyway." She took his hand in hers and leaned her head on his bed. She found pleasure in just watching him sleep. Entranced by his rhythmic breathing, Hermione found it hard to continue.

"I miss you, Harry. I really do, and despite what you think, I believe Crookshanks misses you too. That darn cat just can't figure out why you're not around. You know, I don't think I can either. It just doesn't make any sense. There's nothing wrong with you. You just won't wake up."

Hermione lifted her head and watched his face for any reaction.

"Why won't you wake up? I really want you to. I really _need _you to." Hermione wiped at her eyes with the back of her free hand. "I can't do this alone, Harry. I just can't. The whole world is wrong. Everything's wrong. Hogwarts is closed, and so is the ministry. Even Diagon Alley is mostly shut up. Everyone's hurting." Hermione closed her eyes sharply, then in tones so quiet that nobody could hear, "_I'm _hurting."

Breathing deeply to try and keep her voice from cracking, Hermione continued, "You'd think that the end would be better." Hermione paused to consider the irony. "That since Voldemort's gone, everything would just get better. It hasn't, oh Harry, it hasn't. It's not worse. It's just not better. I can't do this without you, Harry. The world is an insane place now. This is not place to raise a child, Harry."

Unable to control her tears this time, she just let them flow. "I-I'm Pregnant, Harry. I've known for a while now. I knew before the war. I just didn't know how to tell you. I didn't want to tell you. Not while the world was still in pieces. Besides, I knew you would over react, like you always do, and make it seem like I was stricken with some disease that rendered me totally helpless." Hermione found herself smiling at the truth in her words. "But, now I wish more than anything that I had told you, that you had known before..."

"I need you Harry, please come back to me. If not for me, for your child." Hermione leaned in and kissed Harry's forehead, in an effort to communicate what she couldn't with words. "I have to go now Harry, I need rest, and I think I just need to go home. I love you, Harry."

It took all of Hermione's will power to rise and exit the room. But, she knew she had to. She had to get some rest. These insane nights without sleep couldn't be good for her baby.

Heading down the hallway toward Ron's room, she couldn't help but be thankful for all she had. She had a child, and she had a husband, who _would _someday come back to her. If only that someday were soon.

AN: I've been told that Hermione and Ginny are out of character in this story. I agree, but I think it's feasible that with the high emotions of the wizarding world everyond would be getting a little weepy. Anyhew, read and review please! It helps me want to write quickly!


	2. After 02

AN: I saw that on my last chapter I left out my disclaimer. I am new to ffnet so I don't know how to fix it. I'll look in to it, meanwhile if anyone can tell me how to fix it... It's be greatly appreciated!

Disclaimer: I don't own any of the Harry Potter characters. If I did I would have a lot of money, and I don't... Blast! Oh well, maybe one day.

-Chapter Two-

The Pain

It wasn't enough that he had been stuck in this hospital bed for days, but to top that, he was forced to drink the most foul potions known to wizard kind. It wouldn't have been so bad, if he had something to do, but there really wasn't anything to be done.

Ron had been elated when Hermione had stopped by earlier, but it was easy to tell that her mind had been elsewhere. Instead of a distraction, she had served more of a stark reminder of just how bad the world was.

His conversation with Hermione had been left to forced small talk, but he could tell that there was something eating away at her. He only wished that he could do something to help her, but he knew that until she came to him with her problems, it was better to just stay out of it. It didn't matter anyway, because when their transactions became close to a somewhat normal conversation, Hermione abruptly decided to leave.

That had been hours ago, and now Ron was trying to get a healer's attention so he could pester them into letting him go and visit Harry. But it seemed that the Healers were avoiding his part of the ward.

'_Fine, I'll just have to do it myself!_' Ron grumbled. He took a quick glance towards Fred's bed, and saw he was asleep. He let out a sigh of relief as he threw his blanket to the floor. Swinging his legs around and pushing himself off of the bed, Ron immediately regretted his decision. Pain shot up his legs, momentarily clouding his vision. Ron was afraid that he'd pass out, and was relieved when the pain subsided.

'_It's a good thing the healers finally let me wear my own clothes._' Ron mused and he shuffled to the doorway. He didn't really want to have to try wandering around, looking for robes, in his condition.

The pain was getting less intense as he worked legs. Silently he wondered why the healers hadn't let him out of bed before.

He had made it out the door and down the hallway, feeling completely smug, when he was stopped by a loud booming voice.

"RONALD WEASLEY!"

Turning slowly, so he could avoid any unnecessary pain, he found the source of the voice. "Hello, Mum."

"Just what do you think you are doing out of bed? You could hurt yourself! You march yourself right back into your bed and you stay there," Mrs. Weasley spat.

"No." Ron surprised himself. He would have never considered saying no to his mother. But, somehow he felt that in this situation it would be alright.

Mrs. Weasley stiffened at the her son's response. Hurt flashed in her eyes, and Ron almost regretted his answer. But, Mrs. Weasley relaxed when she saw the look in his eyes. They were filled with reckless determination. She forced herself to calm down, something she had been forced to learn because of the war. "Where are you going?"

"I'm going to visit Harry." Ron challenged. Then, not waiting for any kind of response, he spun around and limped further down the hall.

Feeling herself soften, Mrs. Weasley did what any parent might do in this situation. She marched right up to Ron and gave him her arm. "I'll help you there, Dear."

"Thanks, Mum."

Remus Lupin was weary. He felt it in every bone of his body.

Not a lot of study has gone into the sleep patterns of a man stricken with lycanthropy, so no wizard really knows the side-effects that altered sleep patterns can have on a werewolf, that is no wizard but Remus J. Lupin.

He hadn't slept in a long time. Being plagued with nightmares would do that to a person. But, to Remus it was worse. He had them every night, sometimes more than once. It was always the same one.

_He was on the battlefield. Surprisingly deft at dodging the various jinxes and curses that were being flung through the air, he found himself successfully driving away many opponents. All the same he felt it taxing on his energy to dodge and roll, and quickly realized he was running out of strength. _

_He jumped out of the path of an incoming curse, and caught the tail end of another one. The cruciatus curse swept over his entire body. He had been lucky that the dark wizard hadn't been shooting to kill. _

_The pain subsided somewhat, and Remus glanced up to see his attacker. His heart fell when he realized he recognized the face. Mustering all the strength he could, Remus somehow found himself on his feet._

"_You Rat!" Remus spat._

"_In the flesh." Peter Pettigrew drawled. He was no longer the stuttering school boy Remus had once knew. There was no trace of that innocent little boy. The darkness had taken over Peter, had made him stronger. He no longer cowered in fear while the battle raged around him, now he was in the thick of it._

_Remus could feel all the anger and hurt that he had kept so well hidden for the past years begin to boil to the surface. He suddenly wanted to cause as much pain as possible to his traitorous friend. But to let him live, even a minute longer, would be too big of a blessing. He wanted to _kill_ him._

_Peter had lifted his wand again and was forming the words of his curse of choice, and was taken completely by surprise when Remus shouted above the din around him._

"_AVADA KEDAVRA!"_

_In all his fury and all his hurt, Remus had found the strength to use the unforgivable curse. He didn't think he would have been able to go through with it, but when the green flash of light weaved through the air toward it's subject, Remus felt all his energy go into this one spell._

_He watched with no remorse as the spell hit it's mark, and Peter's figure crumpled to the ground. He smiled with a bit of satisfaction as he stood over the body, and imagined what Peter's last thoughts were._

"_Burn in Hell, _Brother_!"_

_Remus would then walk away leaving behind the last remnant of the brotherhood he once had._

At this point, Remus would wake up disoriented. He'd half expect to find himself still in the middle of battle, just recovering from a curse. Then he'd remember that he was at home safe in his bed, and the memories would assault him.

He didn't want to relive his part in the war against evil, but it seemed to creep up on him when he least expected it. He didn't know how he would be able to do it. He couldn't live with the fact that he had killed his brother.

Secretly, he contemplated just ending it all. It was for the best, and It would save everybody a lot of pain in the long run. There was no hidden light in the darkness that surrounded him, just endless black. He felt he had given his all to the war, and then was required to give more. He was sick of feeling so bent, sick of the constant feeling that he is being squeezed through reality, and only just making it.

He wanted _out_.

He knew just how he was going to do it, too.

He didn't believe in any of the magical methods. They were all quick and painless. Somehow casting Avada Kedavra on himself, or taking a poison, didn't seem the way to do it. He wanted to feel his death, wanted to let it run through every part of his body. His death had to have meaning, more meaning than the life he was living currently. So he was going to hang himself. He could calculate it just right so he could almost guarantee that his neck wouldn't break. He'd have to wait while he choked to death. He thought that would be the best way to go.

He wanted to say good bye to Harry first, though. He felt he needed to give him some sort of an explanation. It is for that reason, that he found himself once again in the hexes wing of St. Mungo's, sitting beside Harry's bed.

He had cajoled Hermione into leaving him alone with Harry for a while. A task in and of itself near impossible. Yet, he had succeeded nonetheless. All it took was "Merlin, Hermione, you look terrible!" to usher he to the nearest bathroom. But, now as he sat in the uncomfortable next to Harry's bed, he couldn't seem to find the right words.

Clearing his throat, he began staring at his thumbnail. He found it easier to concentrate when doing so. He studied his hands for a little while, then finally found his voice.

"I came to say good-bye, Harry." Remus swallowed, he felt the tears come again. He had never been an emotional man, but the war brought out the emotion in everyone. "I'm going to leave soon, there's nothing left for me to do here."

He stood, maybe this would be easier if he weren't just sitting there. "I want you to know that I killed him. The person who was behind most of this madness. How amazing that some small little creature can turn the tide so much."

As if expecting an answer, Remus paused. All he received in return was silence. "I thought it would make me feel better, if I killed him. But, it didn't. I don't think it will ever feel better."

"I'm the last one." Remus found he was pacing, and stopped himself.

"I learned something during the war. Just when I began to get confident that we would win, the Death-Eaters began to use the Imperius Curse on many of our number. I watched in horror as many good men and women turned on their friends. Not of their own will, but they turned all the same. That made me think. Everybody has a price. It doesn't take a lot to make someone change sides. I don't know what my price is, but I don't want to stick around to find out."

"I already see it grabbing me. I killed my brother, and I _enjoyed _it! I remember feeling satisfaction! I was happy that I killed him. What kind of monster does that make me?" Once again the floor tile suddenly became interesting, and Remus forced himself to look at Harry's sleeping form.

"I've served the purpose I set out to do, and there isn't _anything_ left for me." The tears that he kept fighting came back in abundance. "I'm sorry, Harry. I just came to say Good-bye."

Remus backed out of the room and hurriedly started down the hall. He felt that he would need to fulfill his intentions quickly, or he wouldn't do it.

He found Mrs. Weasley and Ron meandering down the hall, but he didn't feel like speaking to them. Instead he back-tracked around the other way, and successfully avoided a conversation with the Weasley's.

He took his time getting to the apparation point, wandering around St. Mungos' crowded hallways. When he was finally inside the free-apparation zone he took one last look around him, and apparated home.

AN: Review do help me speed along the writing process. So, if you have something to say about my fic. I'd really really really like to hear it!


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